15 Years of Fighting

We celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary last week. 

I look at the bright, shiny, freshly married couples we know.....and I feel like 15 years is a LONG time! But then I look at the more weathered and wise couples around us that are celebrating decades or a half of a century together.....and I feel that we are babes that have hardly begun to experience our life! 

Either way, 15 years of being married has been a gift that we cherish! We are aware (most days) that we should never take a single day for granted. We complement each other pretty well and from the very beginning of our relationship, we know where our priorities and eyes should be fixed. I wouldn't have had it any other way. If his affections were not on God, he wouldn't have stood a chance with me. 

And that's what's been most pivotal for us and kept us together. I wouldn't know how to love Adam very well if I didn't have Scripture and Jesus to guide me. I would stink at it. I just know it. 

And I'm human and slow and stubborn at times, so some days I still stink at it. But that's where grace and forgiveness comes into play. Which again, I wouldn't fully understand if it wasn't for Jesus. 

I recently heard a quote that "Marriage is an adventure, like going to war." (Chesterton). And I thought, "YES!" Not that we are going to war against each other.....but that we have entered into a lifelong challenge and commitment to fight for one another and for our marriage.

Some days I can almost feel Satan and my own evil desires breathing down my neck. Tempting me to be critical of my husband. Trying to tell me that I'm not doing a good job. That Adam's not doing a good job. Making me look around at others around us and compare finances, credentials, or looks. Tempting me to be cold because I felt he was cold towards me. Using a simple miscommunication to cause my anger to flare when it wasn't even his fault that the text didn't go through. Sheesh. Every day we can encounter things that can drive a wedge between two people that are ON THE SAME TEAM! 

Anyways. Fight for a good marriage. It's worth it. 

Our anniversary weekend lined up nicely with a wedding invitation that we had in GR. And it also lined up very nicely with my mom's availability to keep our boys for a few nights. So, we booked a sweet little Bed and Breakfast outside of South Haven and made a weekend of it. (My apologies that we didn't take great pics....a couple of phone pics will have to suffice).

If you knnow me at all, you know I love a good bathrobe.

The house only had 3 guestrooms and we enjoyed chatting with the other couples in the mornings over generous portions of scrumptious breakfast foods! The Kal-Haven bike trail was literally a few hundred yards from the house. Too bad Adam sold his bike 2 weeks before ("What?!?! You knew we would be riding bikes on our anniversary weekend! It was one of the perks of where we booked! Why would you sell your bike?!?!!!!") (I'm just showing you my tendency to let stupid things come between us). Anyways. 

We still brought along my bike and he looked stunningly handsome on the purple cruiser that the hosts had in their garage for us to use. (Don't worry, we met up with someone from a Craigslist ad on the way home and he has a bike again). We explored South Haven, did some window shopping, walked the pier, etc. An absolutely lovely time together. 

And my goodness, everyone should attend a wedding so close to their anniversary. Such a good reminder of your vows. But this wasn't just a wedding. Don't get me wrong, I could probably get teary watching complete strangers get married. Any bride walking down that aisle would probably get me choked up. And maybe I just found it all more moving because it's our anniversary and we've had a rough year that has brought us closer. This wedding though, this one will likely go down in the memory bank. I lost track of how many times I got choked up! I couldn't tell you what the flowers or centerpieces looked like....I'm sure they were probably lovely, but it's not those things that leave an impact on me. 

Even though the vows were recited after the pastor, I've never heard a bride say them with such genuineness. She sold it and I had to swallow real hard and blink back tears with her last line of "You are my beloved." Then it was followed by the groom's sisters singing an a cappella version of "It is Well" while the bride and groom participated in washing each other's feet. And hearing the toasts and testimonies of their family members during the reception. WATERWORKS! The young couple is certainly in love, but it was also incredibly clear that their faith had guided them and brought them to this point in time and is what would lead them on. (And this young woman didn't deal solely with the typical teenage and young adult stuff....She'd battled cancer starting at the age of 11.) I don't know that I have ever felt so privileged to witness a wedding before. We saw this young man go through middle school/high school and we are so proud of who he is and the woman he has partnered in life with. 

(And to everyone else whose wedding I have attended....Yours was absolutely lovely as well. Don't worry, I'm sure I got teary-eyed and choked up. It's what I do.) (And sorry for not including a pic of us schnazzied-up for the wedding. You'll just have to imagine how nice we looked).

So grateful that Adam and I had the chance to get away and enjoy each other's company for a few days.